I have a kick-ass 2 bedroom 2 bath renovated Row Home on Cooksie St for rent. (Not to be confused with cookies, but if it helps seal the deal, I’ll throw in a batch of my mom’s cookies!) . No other place is gonna have features like this:
– Awesome neighbors to the right and awesome neighbors to the left. It’s like sitting at the cool kids table in high school.– Appliances coated in liquid steel! It makes cooking 300 times more efficient and enjoyable. Forget about eating the food you make! Your taste buds couldn’t handle it.
– Did you see the space in the kitchen? Cupboards. . . Pantry. . . If you filled this thing to capacity you could survive the zombie apocalypse, no problem! *Shotgun not included. :+(– Washer and dryer! This device is so amazing it will sort & fold your laundry!!* (*Won’t actually sort & fold your laundry.)– You have 2 staircases to choose from! Either go upstairs to the bedrooms or downstairs to the basement! Two is ALWAYS better than 1.– Did you say light Maple flooring? You bet your ass I did! This place is so damn open and airy it’s like you’re living on a mountain peak!– Hundreds of exposed bricks on the front of the house!– Extra freezer in the basement?! OMG, can I make this place any better?– Hot water. . . Need I say more?I could go on and on about the amazing features of the house, but let’s look at the neighborhood:– Walk to work? In Baltimore? YES YOU CAN! (If you work at Under Armour, you’re practically next door.) If not, you can take an Uber, bus or the water taxi! Yeah, I said it, water taxi — bitches!– Who am I kidding, ain’t nobody got time to walk! Drive on one of our many well paved roads in Locust Point.
– Do you like history? Of course you don’t! Do you like war? HELL YEAH! Walk to Ft. Mchenry!
– Have a dog? Let Fido run free and smell the other dog’s asses at the Latrobe Park Dog Park!
– Have a cat? There is plenty of counter space for your cat to push stuff on to the floor!
– Looking to get involved? Join the super-dedicated Locust Point Civic Association. I heard they care and do things.
– If you’d rather get your drink on, head out to one of our local watering holes.This place is so popular; hipsters started ironically boycotting it before it was even built! Let’s face it, you’re not going to find a better place. Act quickly, because this opportunity won’t last long.Email me!
TL:DR Row home, 2 Bedroom, 2 Bathrooms, Central Air/Heat, Basement (for storage), Stainless Steel appliances, W/D, Rebuilt 2006, Hardwood floors, Deck off Master Bedroom, Patio off Kitchen. Pets negotiable. $30 application fee for each tenant. 1 month security deposit. No smoking inside. Yada yada yada.