If you see someone in the Baltimore area waving around a Dynasil RMD LPA-1, call the cops. What is a Dynasil RMD LPA-1? It’s just a ray-gun-looking gadget that uses X-ray fluorescence to measure the amount of lead on a painted surface. What exactly is X-ray fluorescence? I don’t know. The point is, someone stole one of these radioactive death rays from the 2600 block of E. Monument Street on Monday.
Okay, so technically the Maryland Department of the Environment says the device poses “no imminent public health risk” because the radioactive stuff is contained in a “tungsten shield” so it’s only sending out its zappy rays “when the instrument’s face is in contact with a surface.”
So, until further notice, stay away from any areas with surfaces — just to be safe. And if you have any information on this incident, you can call any one of these three numbers.
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