What If Baltimore Dressed Up as DC for Halloween?

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Beehive hairdos, Under Armour, Old Bay, and marble stoops: That’s what Washington, D.C.-based humor blog Rock Creek Snark suggests if D.C. were to dress up as Baltimore for Halloween.

The whole post is worth reading, with some pretty good digs at both cities:

For her part, Mayor Muriel Bowser plans to go as Baltimore Mayor Stephanie Rawlings-Blake, but reportedly fears that by dressing up as the second female mayor of a large Mid-Atlantic city from a wealthy black neighborhood and concomitant political machine, who assumed power after her predecessor’s corruption scandal, no one will notice she’s in costume.

But it made me wonder: What would it look like if Baltimore were to dress up as D.C. on October 31? We’d probably need half the city to dress up in expensive suits and ask them to walk around all day, frowning while looking at their phones. What else, readers?

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  1. All our restaurants could lower the quality of their food and charge twice as much for it, and we could all go anyway because it’s in a great location and we like the vibe.

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