Elizabeth Heubeck

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Elizabeth Heubeck is a Baltimore Fishbowl contributor and local freelance writer.

Big Fish: Sharon Love on Relationship Violence, Her Foundation to End It, and Daughter Yeardley

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Photo courtesy of Baltimore Sun.
Photo courtesy of Baltimore Sun.

On May 3, 2010, Cockeysville resident Sharon Love was eagerly anticipating the graduation of her 22-year-old daughter, Yeardley, from the University of Virginia. But early that morning, she received a knock on her door. On the other side of the door were police officers, who informed her that her daughter had been found dead. Yeardley’s on-again, off-again boyfriend, George Huguely V, would soon be arrested, charged with beating her to death, and sentenced to 23 years in prison. The murder of her daughter could have handed Sharon Love a life-sentence of personal grief. But she had bigger, better plans.

Checking up on the Kids — and the Parents — at Sleepovers

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boys drinking

My kids are still in middle school, but already I’ve begun to take mental notes of their friends who seem most likely to become, uh, shall I say, highly adventurous teenagers. You know, the ones with whom you might not want your kid spending the weekend. But here’s the thing: When it comes to being concerned about the company your teenagers keep, it’s not just their peers you’ve got to worry about.

Sometimes, the parents are the problem.

Consider the scenario in which Molly Shattuck, Baltimore mother-of-three, allegedly invited a 15-year-old boy to spend the evening at her beach house with her same-age son and younger siblings present.

College Match Plus Hosts Former Princeton Admissions Pro for Baltimore Presentation

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10.10_logo_collegematch

Kate Cleary is the mother of two sons who attended Gilman and Boys Latin. Along with them, she went through the vigorous college application process, guiding her sons as they gained acceptance to selective colleges. For the last 27 years, she has worked as a strategic consultant for Art & Science Group, a consulting firm providing market-informed enrollment and branding strategy to higher education clients. Now, drawing on her vast insider’s knowledge of higher education, she is creating her own firm: College Match Plus.

“It’s college counseling based on a robust planning tool that helps families develop a sensible college list, identify areas of improvement for a student, and come away with a realistic picture of the group of competitive colleges a student has a good chance of getting into,” Cleary says.

Advantages of College Match Plus:

  • Comprehensive evaluation of a student based on an empirical rating system that considers essential factors beyond standardized test scores and GPA
  • Personalized counseling that draws from extensive knowledge of numerous top-tier colleges and universities
  • An affiliate of Betterton College Planning, owned by Don Betterton, who served on Princeton University’s Admissions Committee and as Director of Financial Aid
  • A process that streamlines and de-mystifies the complex college search and application process for families

Services of College Match Plus:

  • Comprehensive evaluation of a student’s profile and how it matches with the admissions criteria of competitive colleges
  • Assistance with all aspects of the college admissions process from college application and interview preparation to advice about financial aid and financing college.

Revised CollegeMatchPlus ad

Get a glimpse of the services that College Match Plus can provide your family. On Friday, November 14, at 7:30 p.m., join Kate Cleary as she hosts a presentation at 1006 Fallscroft Way, Lutherville, Md where Don Betterton, of Betterton College Planning, gives an informative hour-long session on what families should know about the competitive college admissions process and how institutions evaluate candidates.

 

To register for this free event or to learn more about College Match Plus, call or email Kate Cleary at 410-458-6184 or [email protected]

 

 

 

 

 

Wake Up, Parents: Teens Need Their Sleep

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tired teen
Waiting for a youth baseball game to begin, I whiled away the time talking with a guy whose kid seemed to have a lot in common with my son: Same age, shared interests, similar school curriculums. Before long, the conversation turned to homework. “He’s working his butt off,” the dad said. “Up ‘til 11 most nights, oftentimes up at 5:30 and back at it again.” As in 5:30 a.m.

Accomplished Educator Abandons Jet-setting Retirement to Lead BDS

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Dr Patrylo Photo

This year, the city’s four-year-old Baltimore Design School hired Dr. Melissa Patrylo as its new principal. Located in the heart of Baltimore’s burgeoning arts and entertainment district, Station North (more specifically, Greenmount West), the school currently enrolls students in grades six through ten, with plans to expand through twelfth grade within two years. It’s housed in a beautifully renovated 100-year-old historic building that previously served as a bottle-making factory and then a clothing factory before becoming vacant, falling into disrepair, and being used on some of the scarier scenes of The Wire. Now, with loads of light coming through its floor-to-ceiling windows, state-of-the-art technology filling its classrooms, and energetic teachers focusing its students, the school aims to be the first in Maryland to graduate students with both a Baltimore City high school diploma and sound preparation for continued education in the fields of architecture, graphic design, or fashion design. With Dr. Patrylo at the helm, there’s no telling where these students will go.

Garrison Forest School Offers Stellar Support at the Race for the Cure

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Members of the Garrison Forest School community stand in front of the "Tree of Hope".
Members of the Garrison Forest School community stand in front of the “Tree of Hope”.

The wind was whipping on Thursday morning as parent volunteers hung hundreds of yards of pink ribbon through the sturdy limbs of a stately tree on the campus of Garrison Forest School. On the ribbon were messages of hope, courage, and remembrance, scrawled by students at the independent all-girls school in Owings Mills. The symbolic gesture was just part of the school community’s broad support of Breast Cancer Awareness Month, which culminates with the Susan G. Komen Foundation’s Race for the Cure, this Sunday, October 26, 2014 in Hunt Valley.

The Bullying Goes On: From Hi-tech Tactics to Simple, Animal-like Behavior

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Photo courtesy of howstuffworks.com
Photo courtesy of howstuffworks.com

Cyberbullying is the latest buzzword in the war against bullying. School-based lectures and wide-scale campaigns denouncing cyberbullying have beaten the message into adolescents that posting mean stuff online about someone you know can be extremely painful to the victim, resulting in despair, isolation and, in extreme cases, suicide. But the bullying goes on.

Besotted by Baseball: Teen Super Fan Bucks Trend, Wins Orioles “Magic Moment” Competition

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Gilman senior Ben Auwaerter impersonating former Oriole player, Mike Devereaux.
Gilman senior and contest winner Ben Auwaerter impersonating former Oriole Mike Devereaux.

As sports lovers go, baseball fan Ben Auwaerter is somewhat of a throwback.

Do Parents’ Worries Ever Wane?

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Photo courtesy of Peterborough Photographers.
Photo courtesy of Peterborough Photographers.

On my wedding day, my father put an arm around my husband and said something like: “Good luck, son. She’s your responsibility now.” At the time, I thought he was joking. Twenty some years and two kids later, I realize he probably wasn’t.

Why Adolescents Should Watch the Ray Rice Video

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Photo courtesy of wordondastreet.com
Photo courtesy of wordondastreet.com

I usually resist watching videos released by the media that warn viewers of their graphic nature. I’d be a little more happily naïve today had I gone with my usual guidelines on media voyeurism. But maybe, as disturbing as the Ray Rice elevator-scene video was, it’s a good thing I saw it. Maybe my adolescent son and daughter should see it too. But that wasn’t my initial reaction.

It wasn’t just the blow that Ray Rice unleashed on his then-fiancé that made me wince. It was seeing the way he dragged her lifeless body out of the elevator as she lay, face down, her legs and part of her backside uncomfortably exposed, like a Barbie doll missing a key part of her outfit, that I couldn’t shake. It made me want to get a blanket and cover her up, quick.

The following day, when I read the comments of Rice’s (now) wife, once again I wanted to throw a blanket on her. This time, the blanket would have been to cover up the seemingly skewed message she delivered, particularly this segment: “THIS IS OUR LIFE! What don’t you all get. If your intentions were to hurt us, embarrass us, make us feel alone, take all happiness away, you’ve succeeded on so many levels. Just know we will continue to grow & show the world what real love is!”

Real love, huh?

Instead of defending the man who’d punched her unconscious, Janay Rice could have made a powerful statement and sent a strong message to young people about partner violence. But, at least publicly, she scolded the media for exposing her husband’s violence against her—something she perhaps felt ill-equipped to do.

The prevalence of domestic violence seems out of place in today’s world, when many women have become as or more powerful than men in significant ways. An ever-increasing number of women are joining the ranks of CEOs at leading companies; more women than men are enrolling in and graduating from college; and, increasingly, women (40 percent of those with children under 18) serve as the sole or primary contributor of their family’s income, according to the Pew Research Center.

Advancements aside, troubling high-profile cases of domestic violence continue to surface in the media. Chances are, many low-profile but equally horrific cases occur out of the limelight. It leaves me wondering what I can do to prevent my own adolescent children from one day becoming a perpetrator or victim in a violent relationship.

I like to think that growing up in a stable, loving family where physical violence plays no role is enough to prevent my kids from getting involved in unhealthy relationships later in life. But I’m not sure if that’s a guarantee.

After the Ray Rice video went viral, I tried talking to my kids about how wrong it is to hurt or accept harm from anyone with whom you’re in a relationship. It came out sounding stilted and preachy. I mentioned earlier that I don’t like watching videos containing warnings of their ‘graphic’ nature. To date, I’ve tried to limit my kids’ exposure to them, too. But maybe in this instance, permitting or even suggesting that my kids watch the elevator video will lead to an open conversation about domestic violence, one that packs a punch more powerful than Ray Rice’s.

 

 

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