Okay, But Let’s Not Call Them the Baltimore Bullets

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Excitement over the Washington Wizards playing a pre-season game against the New York Knicks at the Baltimore Arena in October has spurred talk of Baltimore having its own NBA franchise again. Mayor Stephanie Rawlings-Blake said she “would love” for Baltimore to host a professional basketball team and has “been in communication with other people who are like-minded” on the idea.

Of course, there’s plenty currently standing in the way of making this a reality. Rawlings-Blake hasn’t actually spoken to anyone within the NBA about it; the Baltimore Arena is “obsolete;” other cities (like Seattle, for instance) are also in the market for a team; and the Wizards play only 35 miles away.

But it’s never too soon to suggest a mascot for this pipe dream! First off, I hope we can agree that despite its history, “Bullets” is out. Right? Good. Now that we’ve got that out of the way, there’s definitely an argument to be made for an avian mascot. It would fit in nice and cozy with the Ravens and Orioles, sealing the deal on the “This Is Birdland” slogan. But what bird? Personally, I have great affection for the mockingbirds that wake me up cheeping like a car alarm. So if we’re going bird here, that’s my vote.

But the Ravens have really opened the door for literary references. And this new team gives us a nice opportunity to recognize a writer upon whom Baltimore has a less disputed claim. So, ultimately, I’ve got to go with “Baltimore Menckens.”

Maybe we’re lucky that it’s not up to me.



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