Are you thinking about getting married, or renewing your vows?
With Valentine’s Day approaching soon, Baltimore-based writer, filmmaker and ordained minister John Waters is making a rare offer for one lucky couple that’s serious about getting married.
Waters has offered to officiate the wedding of the couple that submits the highest bid in the winter fundraising auction that benefits one of his favorite causes, the Provincetown Film Society.
The online auction went live on Jan. 30 and ends at 11:59 p.m. on Feb. 8.
“This is a once-in-a-life chance for you and your partner to be married or your vows renewed by the legendary writer, director, and Provincetown ‘filth elder’ John Waters,” the auction listing states.
“John will officiate an intimate, private ceremony for up to 10 guests including the married couple, ensuring the moment is personal, unforgettable, and delightfully offbeat. If you’re tying the knot, John will even provide a 10-minute premarital counseling session beforehand, because he takes marrying couples seriously.”
The writer and director of 16 movies including “Pink Flamingos” and “Hairspray,” and author of books including “Shock Value” and “Mr. Know-It-All: The Tarnished Wisdom of a Filth Elder,” Waters has permanent residences in Baltimore, New York and San Francisco, but he’s spent every summer since 1964 in the Cape Cod beach town and is a strong supporter of the film society.
Rare occasions
Waters has been certified to perform weddings for years but is highly selective about the ones he takes on, which makes John Waters weddings extremely rare. He became an ordained Universal Life Church minister in order to officiate the wedding of Johnny Depp and Winona Ryder when Depp was 26 and filming “Cry-Baby” in Baltimore, but the ceremony ultimately didn’t take place. One recent wedding that he performed was the Nov. 16 marriage of another Johnny, Jackass and A Dirty Shame star Johnny Knoxville, and costume designer Emily Ting (also attended by their dog, Bucket.)
“John hasn’t married many, but the ones he has, have lasted, and he wants to continue that track record,” the auction listing says.
To that end, “the winning couple will send John a short write-up about themselves. He’ll share the standard wedding vows, which you’re welcome to personalize and return, and he will approve and then use. The ceremony may take place in Provincetown, Baltimore, New York City or San Francisco, at a location and date approved by John. John will take photos with the wedding party and guests before the reception. He will pass on invitations to attend the reception or party post ceremony.”
This is the sixth year that Waters, 79, has donated an item for the film society’s fundraiser, and they’re always a highlight. He led a tour of Provincetown sex haunts in 2021; cooked up a “Dinner at the Dump” in 2022; hosted a “Soiree at the Sewer” in 2023; spent a night in jail with four superfans in 2024, and offered a collection of signed memorabilia in 2025. Each year, he aims to come up with experiences and items that are new and different from any others in the auction. In all, his donations have raised more than $60,000 for the film society.
Besides securing the venue for their wedding, the successful bidders have to obtain the wedding license and complete any needed paperwork; Waters will send a copy of his license if necessary.
Conan O”Brien, Stephen Colbert and Lady Gaga
Universal Life Church bills itself as one of the largest and most active religious organizations in the world. According to its website, it’s non-denominational and has provided legal ordination to more than 20 million ministers worldwide since it was incorporated in 1962 by Kirby J. Hensley, and that authorizes them to perform weddings (and baptisms and funerals, and even operate their own churches.)
Universal Life’s doctrine is: “Do that which is right.” Most of the church’s ministers are ordained through its free, online, “one-click” ordination process. Other ULC ministers include Conan O’Brien, Stephen Colbert, Richard Branson and Lady Gaga.
According to a 2007 article in The New Yorker by Rebecca Mead, Waters obtained his “ministerial package” in 1989, including the ULC’s mail-order ordination certificate that has a gold seal and is suitable for framing.
“I did it when we were making ‘Cry-Baby,’ because at the time Johnny Depp and Winona Ryder were going to be married, and Johnny’s lawyers asked me to be ordained,” Mead quoted Waters as saying. “I think Winona and Johnny wanted to add a twist to it.”
Waters told Mead that out of 13 ceremonies he had performed when they spoke, only one had ended in divorce.
“I try not to do it too much anymore,” he said. “People want me to write witty ceremonies, which I don’t do now. I let them write it. And I charge seven dollars, in cash, and report it on my tax return. They have to give me correct change.”
The $7 fee still applies, according to the Provincetown auction listing.
From trips to art to theater tickets
Started in 1999, the non-profit Provincetown Film Society is dedicated to showcasing new achievements in independent film and honoring the work of emerging as well as acclaimed directors, producers and actors. Known for its strong support of LGBTQ filmmakers and their work, it has three primary activities: producing the annual Provincetown International Film Festival, now in its 27th year; running a year-round theater, the Water’s Edge Cinema, and overseeing the Gabrielle A. Hanna Provincetown Film Institute for film and media artist residencies and conferences. Bids and donations to the auction help support its work.
Waters, 79, is one of dozens of individuals and business owners who have donated items for this year’s auction, which includes vacation trips, art, theater tickets, unusual gifts and collectibles — 130 items in all. Actor Murray Bartlett is hosting a private dinner for two bidders. Actress Kathleen Turner, who played the title role in Waters’ 1994 movie, “Serial Mom,” is offering a personalized recorded voicemail greeting for the winning bidder’s incoming phone messages.
Additional auction items include: a walking tour of Provincetown with Town Crier Daniel Gomez Llata; a haunted history tour of Provincetown; a private Provincetown dune tour; a week-long stay in a Provincetown dune shack; luxury rentals in Provincetown, New York and Palm Springs; a whale watch for two; group Pilates classes; gift certificates to local and regional shops and restaurants, and passes to the 2026 Provincetown International Film Festival, June 10 to 14.
“Different kind of reverend’
As of Feb. 6, the high bid for the Waters-officiated wedding was $5,200, and the reserve has been met. Film society board President Gabby Hanna and other organization leaders promise it will be a memorable experience.
“Don’t miss your chance,” they stress in the auction listing, “to say ‘I do’ with a decidedly different kind of reverend and walk away with a love story no one else can top.”
What if more than one couple really, really wants to get married by John Waters?
“Just one,” he said in an email message. “I’m pickier than the Vatican.”
