Artscape is touted as “America’s largest free arts festival,” but some of that prodigious size is achieved by a pretty loose sense of the word “arts.” For example, Atlantic City, in attempt to make us forget our own slots parlors and casinos, will be bringing a mobile two-story mini-resort to Baltimore’s most loved summer shindig, showcasing the city’s well-known arts of massage, roulette, and “other entertainment.

Okay, so it looks like as part of the miniaturized Atlantic City experience participants will have the opportunity to get their pictures taken with goofy glasses and props. Photographs are art. No question. You’ve got me there, A.C. 

And you know what, even the roulette is only a representation, as no real gambling will take place. That’s kind of arty, isn’t it? Oh, and Oscar Wilde once said of art, “It is superbly sterile, and the note of its pleasure is sterility.” That sounds about right, too.

Okay, I’m in. Everybody, let’s go get those arty massages!