Oh. My. God. Thirteen state prison guards at a Baltimore jail have been indicted for helping imprisoned members of the Black Guerrilla Family gang execute a “drug-trafficking and money-laundering scheme from behind bars that involved cash payments, sex and access to fancy cars.”

Four of these guards (all of whom are women, by the way) became pregnant by a single inmate. Four of them. Two of those guards got his name tattooed on their bodies.

Gary D. Maynard, head of a prison oversight agency, and a 2007 O’Malley appointment, said, “It’s totally on me.”

Hey man. It’s whatever. I’m just trying to run for president here.

People, seriously. It only gets more Gotham City from there. For more, read the Washington Post article.