At least in snow-averse Baltimore, severe winter weather can make an impact well before it arrives. The promise of an historically severe blizzard hitting the region tonight has been enough to clear supermarket shelves, close schools, and earn a state-of-emergency declaration from the governor — all before any flakes begin to fall local.
My parents and my husband’s parents live close to us (mine, around 20 minutes, and his, within an hour), so we are lucky, especially since we have a two-year old daughter, “Kelsey.” Both sets of grandparents have been around for Kelsey’s birthdays, and we can easily go to both houses for Christmas/Hanukkah, Thanksgiving, Mother’s Day, etc. This should be the ideal set-up, right? But it’s not.
The problem is that my husband’s parents don’t really seem that interested in Kelsey. They are generous with birthday and holiday gifts, but they don’t spend much time with her. Even though they are all retired, only my parents are available if we need some help with her. To be honest, we have never asked my husband’s parents because they have never volunteered or indicated any willingness along those lines. They even want to be called “Grandmother and Grandfather” instead of much more affectionate names like “Nana and Pop-pop.”
What really bothers me is that I want my daughter (and any subsequent kids) to know all of their grandparents and have a strong connection like I did with my grandparents. I want her to feel special and loved by my husband’s parents like she does with mine.
I’ve wanted to talk to them so that they know how I feel, but my husband doesn’t see any point because, as he says, “They are just different people” than my parents. I feel like I ought to do something since it’s a question of how her life is going to be with them. I just can’t forget about it because I don’t want her to miss out on something so important. What do you think I should do?
Wants the Best for her Daughter
What I think you should do is to refrain from speaking to your in-laws about the way they behave toward your daughter (and especially what they want to be called by Kelsey) Talking to them can only make them feel that you disapprove of them as grandparents, which, of course, will only make them more hesitant to do anything with or for Kelsey.
From Cool Progeny – Spring… are you out there? One local family turned Disney’s hot snowman song into a melodic plea for warm weather with a side of funny.
Hope you’re wearing your fuzzy slippers and sipping on a nice, steaming mug of hot cocoa as you read this: Yesterday morning it was 4, yes 4 degrees outside, which made it the coldest March temperature ever recorded in Baltimore. I’ll repeat that, in case your snow-addled brain missed it the first time: Yesterday was the coldest March day in Baltimore, ever.
This column, That Nature Show, is about the nature right under your nose: in our backyards, playgrounds and parks! Stop and look around, you’ll be amazed at what surrounds you.
This Sunday, February 2 is Groundhog Day (Grundsaudaag, Murmeltiertag) a holiday in the Pennsylvania German folkloric tradition of assessing when spring is coming based on the emergence of a ground-dwelling rodent.
They are my people, the Germans (not the rodents) on my mother’s side. My grandfather’s grandfather was a brewer outside of Pittsburgh, so as a child I was a big believer in the predictive abilities of Punxsutawney Phil, the groundhog, Punxsutawney Pennsylvania’s most famous resident and a star of the movie Groundhog Day with Bill Murray.
My outerwear was determined by a groundhog. In late February with ice still on the ground I’d say to my grandma, “I don’t need a cardigan, Punxsutawney Phil said its going to be an early spring.” Like that carried weight.
Like you should trust the largest member of the squirrel family? Most certainly you should not. Research shows Phil’s “spring predictions are less accurate than chance.”